Tag Archives: family life

Life goes on

Time marches on relentlessly, can you believe it is mid May already? This post focuses on the ups and downs of everyday life and celebrates my acceptance of letting life flow as it pleases.

our-journey-our-story

Six weeks have passed since Game Over when I walked away from my city job feeling humiliated but very relieved to be out of the unfriendly environment. After that brief encounter everything at home seemed more appealing and I welcomed its comforting embrace.

How proud we were to attend the ceremony to see our youngest daughter graduate from University and receive the revered Vice-Chancellor’s award for her contribution to University life. Peter and I are in awe of the positive influence our daughter has on others, she is mesmerizing and a motivator to all. As Laura walked on to the stage to receive her awards I thought my heart would burst with joy.

One day I suddenly decided to track down my old school friend Libby through Facebook. We hadn’t seen each other for 30 years and met up to catch up on all the news on our lives. There is something special about old friends, they remember and see you as a younger person. The best mirror is an old friend.

Four weeks after the city office saga a former colleague invited me to return to work at the suburban campus for one day a week with further hours working from home. This offer suited me perfectly and I eagerly accepted. So for now I have the best of both worlds.

Every year I look forward to Mothers Day and cherish our family celebrations but this year was extra special when all three of my adult children joined Peter and I for a lovely homemade dinner.  My children each gave me a card and wrote personal and heartfelt   messages that I will treasure forever. These are the words people often say at funerals when it is too late for the person to hear. I’m so proud of the loving and sensitive nature my children exude. Being a mother is the most rewarding experience imaginable.

My poor old Dad had a setback recently. He stumbled and fell over while visiting my mother’s grave to lay red roses to honor her birthday . We later learned he had a heart attack, which restricted blood flow to his leg causing it to give way underneath him. He had surgery to dislodge the clot and his progress has been slow because he has lost strength in the leg. Next he is off to a rehabilitation hospital to help try to reinstate his independence. My Dad is old and tired and it breaks my heart to see him struggling to walk.

Peter and I have been talking about life being short and making the most of every day and have decided to return to Europe in September this year to discover more of Germany, France, Austria and Switzerland. Just like last time I’m a little tentative to leave my dog, my family and my home for seven weeks but I know how lucky I am to have the chance to see more of the world and grow with new experiences.

 

 

 

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Come what may

different point of viewYou never know when things are about to change that will challenge your preconceived concepts about life.

I remember life being less sophisticated in the 70’s when Google,  personal computers or mobile phones didn’t exist.

I learned about sex education from a book in the school library that I didn’t dare borrow and had to read quickly before anyone saw me. Somehow the information sunk in and I later had three children.

I vividly remember cradling my newborn baby daughter Lisa totally awestruck by the radiance of another baby to cherish forever. I hoped my children would be happy, healthy, lead fulfilling lives, get married and have children of their own.

The years spent embracing the pleasures and challenges of raising children flew past and before I knew it my children were adults.

One evening while at a Mexican restaurant I was blissfully unaware that our lives were about to take a dramatic turn. Normally effervescent and great company Lisa seemed preoccupied and I sensed something was troubling her.

After a couple of veiled attempts Lisa eventually managed to steer the conversation towards what she wanted to say.

“Mum and Dad, I’m gay.”

I looked at my husband’s face and knew he too was vulnerable about how to respond. This is not something we had expected. I felt uncomfortable hearing about it in a restaurant with people around us. I couldn’t think straight and was trying to understand what this would mean to our family.

“It’s just a phase you’re going through,” I said apprehensively.

“It is not a phase. I know who I am, I know what I feel and I know I am gay,’ Lisa said forcefully.

“We don’t want your life to be difficult because of social stigmas attached to homosexuality,” her father offered.

“I can’t change who I am to be convenient for society,” Lisa spat back at him.

Lisa tearfully tried to explain her feelings to us but we were still confused by her coming out. The conversation continued until our emotions were exhausted.  After paying for our meal we drove home together with an uneasy feeling in the air.

In bed that night we discussed our feelings about our daughter being gay. We didn’t know anything about lesbians. We knew a few  gay men and thought nothing of it, but this was our daughter, to us this seemed quite different.

After we couldn’t talk anymore I lay in bed going over in my mind what had transpired that evening. With the benefit of time alone to process my thoughts I knew that nothing could taint or change my love for Lisa who would always be my beautiful daughter.

As the light shone through the curtains signaling a new day I was hit by a warm sense of calm and clarity. I knew that all I needed to do was update the preconceived ideas I had when my baby was born all those years ago. It was that simple.